September 2023

Absolute Heartbreak

How I felt about having a little sister… I’m going to miss you

By now, many of you know that the world tragically lost my sister, Joanna, on August 19th. She was shockingly diagnosed with Acute Leukemia on July 20th and less than a month later she was gone. As is her nature, she opted for the most aggressive treatment should could receive.

She was doing so well they discharged her from inpatient care after only 2 weeks (typically 4 weeks). Devastatingly, she contracted bacterial meningitis, which led to loss of brain function. Due to her cancer treatment, she didn’t have the immune system to fight it.

To say this is shocking would be an understatement. I am still trying to process how a strong and healthy 37-year-old is diagnosed with cancer, let alone the fact that she was taken from us so quickly.

As her brother, I haven’t been able to really put anything into words yet about her or her life. That will come in time, or at least, I will try. I’m not really sure how to even begin to summarize my sister. I am convinced that no matter how I eulogize her, it will fall short of capturing everything she was to all of us, but most importantly to her wife, and her daughters.

However, one thing I do know is that she and I have gone through so much together. One thing we have experienced in this life is an inordinate amount of unyielding love and support from our community. After my Stepdad Josh and my Mom died in 2009 and 2011 (along with my grandparents in 2013 and 2016), I was saturated with love. I was never alone in the journey. Our family, extended, our friends of friends, our neighbors in other states, and our co-workers all became our family. They quite literally picked us up off the ground and at times dragged us along with them as we pushed forward. Since that period of time I quickly came to the conclusion that I had an unpayable tab, but I was going to try my hardest to pay every cent of it forward.

And then suddenly, Jo got sick and passed away. I felt myself jolt right back to those years. Floored, gutted, crestfallen, weeping tears as I watched 30 of her family members and close friends say their goodbyes to my sister. All I wanted to do was go home and hug my children, thank God for them. Thank God for their naivety. I think that was the worst day of my life. It’s one thing to take my sister from us, but to take her from her girls (5 and 3) with another baby on the way, that I will never understand. And yet, here I am again being propped up by the notes, texts, messages, calls, and pure love.

So I will (for now) conclude with this… thank you. I am still working my way backwards to all of you that reached out. I DO want to talk and I am incredibly grateful for you. Squeeze your VIP’s a little tighter, if you love them just tell them and do it OFTEN.

I love you forever, JoJo.